[Editor’s Note: This article was inspired by the alternative ending provided by this KotOR mod by Strudel Man, where a female Dark Side Revan can choose to die on the Star Forge with Carth, instead of conquering the Galaxy as a Sith Lord.]
You have a decision to make.
As of late, your life has revolved around two choices: to do good, or to do evil. The moral absolution has crushed you and you’re frustrated with such restrictions; however, this choice, this last choice, is different. So don’t screw it up.
Who are you? Now that is a tricky question, because you are not sure yourself. Lately, you’ve developed a minor personality disorder. Those devious Jedi, in erasing your memory they thought to gain control of their enemies to achie
ve victory. Ironically, they only set in motion their own destruction because here you are, holding the galaxy by its throat. You are Revan, the Dark Lord of the Sith, returned to all your malevolent glory and about to set off to conquer the galaxy again. This is the end of the road. Finally, you have had your vengeance.
As you stand in the cold hanger bay about to escape on the Ebon Hawk, you feel triumph rise in your cold black bitch heart. It seems the galaxy has one last decision for you to make. It comes in the form of Carth Onasi miraculously appearing before you in this cold hanger bay, begging you to stop.
Why would you stop? Your life has always been linear, a hyperlane with no deviations permitted. Your decision between the Light Side, or the Dark Side, was irrelevant. It would have never altered the planets you saw or individuals you met. The end - though unforeseeable - would remain the same. Only now are you realizing that the end has finally come. Your ending was always to be in this cold hanger bay, listening to Carth confess his love for you.
The thought of Carth still loving you brings a smile to your cracked black lips. The fool actually believes he can save you! You can’t help but release a small chuckle from your throat. Redemption is for children because they - and stupid schuttas - believe in fantasies. In this intergalactic melodrama, you have been cast as the villain. Every story has one, but yours is unique. Generally, villains are supposed to be defeated by a hero but for you, the hero and villain were the same person. Some would argue your choice was symbolic; others, black humor. This time no noble Jedi Knight would save the galaxy. Evil would surely prevail.
Carth continues begging for you to stop. Bastila is chiming in asking if she can butcher him. Oh Bastila, you were once the perfect Jedi, but you fell to the Dark Side so easily. You suppose her bloodlust has always been hidden underneath the Jedi calmness. She also once tried to redeem you; instead, you dragged her down into your cesspool of darkness. Now look at her! So caught up her new found hatred that she doesn’t know how to direct it. You’re connected together by the force, you and Bastila. Through that connection you can hear her inner most thoughts and you discover that she’s planning to kill you. Not now, but eventually. Despite the danger she poses, you can’t help but feel a sense of pride. What a fine Sith she is turning out to be.
Suddenly, the hanger bay walls are painted with the bright lights of the battle outside. Just beyond the hanger bay’s stasis field, the Republic fights for survival. Their effort is futile, they’ve lost, but why not grant them the glory of a final battle? It’ll make a fantastic tale to inspire future generations of Sith.
Carth speaks again, but this time he isn’t begging. This time, he is confident and resolved. You feel your own confidence falter and Bastila senses it immediately. More forcefully, she demands that you and her leave the Star Forge. Carth snaps back, his tongue quivering with righteousness. He proclaims his love for you one last time and you believe him, which only causes Bastila to spout more venom, her hand reaching for her lightsaber. You speak and your voice echoes against the durasteel walls of the hanger bay. Both Bastila and Carth are silent as they wait for your decision.
You review your options: 1: Kill Carth and rule the galaxy with Bastila as its Sith overlords; 2: Kill Bastila and escape with Carth, hoping that the Republic will forgive you; 3: Kill them both and be on your merry way.
Whilst considering all of this
, you are struck by your conscience. Where has that been hiding? It certainly wasn’t there when you murdered Jolee and Juhani. It wasn’t present when you forced Zaalbar to kill Mission. It didn’t even announce itself during all those times when you butchered countless individuals for your own pleasure. And yet you feel guilt building in the pit of your stomach.
Carth is wrong. There is no forgiveness, no redemption possible for you. You have done too many horrible, evil things; however, it doesn’t mean that you can’t stop. This is the end, the curtain call of your life. There’s no longer a need to stay in character.
From the look in his eyes, Carth knows what you’ve decided. His hands are twitching subtly for his blasters. Bastila is still unaware of your decision. Her death will be painless and it’s the least you can do.
In seconds it’s over, the hanger bay rings momentarily with the sound of blaster fire and the clashing of lightsabers. Afterwards, you and Carth embrace as relief washes over you. You grip him tightly, seconds away from the Star Forge’s self-destruction. You’re terrified, yet you feel a sense of fulfillment. As the station shakes and star cruisers flee for safety, you enjoy an ending that you didn’t deserve. In the end, you weren’t a hero or a villain, but a woman in the arms of her lover.
You squeeze your eyes shut and grip Carth tighter, wishing things could have been slightly different as death’s warm embrace encircles you.
Sam Mercaldo
@zodthegod1
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